Recess is now in session...

I have been giving a quiz to my girlfriends lately (shhh, its a surprise for later) and when we arrive at this fill in the blank question:

My favorite part of school was __________.

A.) Recess

B.) Passing notes

C.) Field Trips

D.) Classes

they tend to look at me bemused for a moment. Every single one of them initially wants to pick option A.

Many though, once they give the question some thought, eventually pick one of the other options.

What is this reaction of shock, fleeting as it may be, all about?

My theory is that every adult, and women to a fault, have a tendency to starve themselves in the arena of Play. Just the memory of Recess is enough to take us on a bit of a trip.

Stand outside a school at that time of day and you will know exactly what I mean.

The shrieking, the laughter, the wildness, the abandon, the ecstasy, the sheer joy!

When is the last time you witnessed a bunch of adults doing that? When was the last time you did that?

When was the last time you did anything just to do it? Not with the aim of getting something in exchange, not with the aim of impressing you or anyone else. (I mean, even the one thing that is certainly made for this, sex, is a minefield of self-restricting-hang-ups for most humans.)

Now, I know that some of you can be quite good at this Play thing, some of the time.

When things are easy, when our relationships are fun, our job is satisfying and our bank account is full we can get seriously caught up in entertaining ourselves (which is what we tend to call play as adults.)

My real question is, are you good at Serious Play?

When your job is on the line, when you are losing someone close to you, when you have no idea what comes next, when you are at your whits end with a problem. Can you find a way to laugh at Life?

I myself have became seriously malnourished in this arena when I took on the life of the entrepreneur, full throttle. I opened a brick and mortar retail establishment and let the sunshine leave my life. Every morning I opened my eyes with thoughts of what that little operation was going to need from me today. Who and what I would owe from another day in business.


Made everyday a tortuous chore really. As I have said before, miserable misery. Somewhere around the four year mark I started to realize what my Life owed me.


I owed myself, not anyone else, the Life of my Dreams. To wake up refreshed and excited to see what comes next. Every twist and turn in the Game being its very own reward.


Now that's Serious Play.

Find a way to have Play in your every moment, of your everyday and I swear you will be way ahead of the Game. That's where the ease is, that's where the joy is, that's where it all becomes worth it (even the bull.)

Dating without Play, without an ability to be fun is a serious drag. Believe me, I've tried it and I do not recommend it. (And if you don't believe me, ask any of the men I dated back then.)

So ladies, before I get back to the whole dating thing I've got some ideas on how to get some Serious Play back into your life.

Check back again next week, I don't want to spoil the surprise...

By the way, the photos in this article are of my absolutely lovely step daughter, Venus. (She is not the little girl pictured here any longer. She has become a beautiful young lady of 18 years of age.)

While having the privilege of participating in a few years of her childhood she taught me more than a bit about the art of Playing and thus the Game of Life.

Thank you for being born dear girl and thank you for finding me again!